Beauty and the Geek
by AcidicCookie and ScrapPancakes
Summary: Characters from Naruto, Howl's moving castle and Ouran High School Host Club come together in this reality TV competition. Beauties and Geeks will be partnered up for the night but fight against each other during. Someone is elimintated each week.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Scrap Cookies here. Day two will be written by Acidic Pancakes. A quick reference to all those that do not know Howell Jenkins: he is from Howl's moving castle. Read the book! That is his birth name. Kyoya Ootori is from Ouran High School. **

The crowd cheered wildly. People were standing and they screamed for their idols to come forth into the studio. A group of people entered through the left back curtains and the crowd went ballistic. This group of people waved to the crowd and some blew kisses. The crowd waved back with handmade boards of their idols. A familiar music played through the theatre and everyone was silenced as a familiar voice echoed through the room.

Jiraiya: Welcome ladies and gentlemen to yet another season of Beauty and the Geek! We have here today our contestants of sixteen people – one of which will leave us this week. Without much further ado, let us introduce our contestants!

The cameras move from contestant to contestant as Jiraiya introduces them.

Jiraiya: Let's start from Team Beauty! Sakura Haruno, Hinata Hyuuga, Ino Yamanaka, Temari, Tenten, Deidara, Hidan and a foreigner, Howell Jenkins! Very well, beauties, please proceed to the pool where you shall wait for the geeks.

The beauties leave the room as their fans cheered. Hidan looked around in confusion as Deidara muttered under his breath. The ladies scurried quickly behind a flamboyant Howell who strutted his way to the pool. Team Geek comes forth as Jiraiya prepares to introduce them.

Jiraiya: Shikamaru Nara, Sasuke Uchiha, Neji Hyuuga, Orochimaru, Itachi Uchiha, Shino Aburame, Pain, and Kyoya Ootori, who is the president of a high school club. Very well then gentlemen, proceed to the living room!

The men shuffled into the living room where they waited for instruction. Pain was adjusting his piercings and Orochimaru bathes his snake. Jiraiya, Kakashi, Iruka, and Kurenai stepped into the living room.

Kakashi: Hello! We're your judges! Your task now is to go outside individually and impress the beauties. At the end of it, the ladies will select you as a partner and you two will proceed to the mansion to choose a bedroom in which you will share. Good luck.

Sasuke: I will go first.

Sasuke leaves the room with dignity and steps outside to the pool.

Sasuke: I am Sasuke Uchiha. I don't like much, but I hate many things. Hmph. What I have is not a dream, but an ambition. I will win this competition and kill my brother!

The beauties looked around. A pink haired femme stood up and took him to the mansion. Sakura grinned from ear to ear as Ino's face greened with envy. As they left, the ladies chattered. Howell sat by the pool, smiling back at his reflection in the water. Hidan prayed silently and Deidara continued to swear under his breath. A figure stood before them and everyone looked up.

Hidan: Oh it's Pain. Well I don't like anyone here. (He points at Howell) Especially you, you homo bitch. You are the only person I know here, Pain. I think we'd better go.

As Howell stands up with a cold glare, the pair left without Pain having much to do. He sits back down next to Ino who blushed immediately. Not much time passed when Neji came out. Although he was long winded, the ladies were blown away by the history of his family. Tenten stood and they walked to the mansion silently.

Shino came out. Bug came flowing out from his arms like rivers and Howell was extremely impressed. He loved spider, but these bugs were equally amusing to him. Giving Shino a charming smile, they left. Hinata began to panic. She knew that there were few men left and she definitely did not want to be paired up with Orochimaru by default.

Itachi stood before them as a dramatic wind blew at him. His glare focused on Temari who was performing all the dramatic effects. She quickly put her fan down and the wind stopped. Itachi proceeded to say something. However, his words were not audible and they sounded like muffled tones. Hinata reluctantly stood up and they paced to the mansion.

Kyoya Ootori entered the poolside and began his speech of boredom. Temari and Deidara were bored but Ino was clearly infatuated by him. She skipped with him to the mansion. Orochimaru was the penultimate geek. He glared from Temari to Deidara.

Orochimaru: I choose Deidara!

Deidara: Hold on now, you little fucker. We are the ones to choose, not you. Transsexual bastard.

Orochimaru releases his inner snake who curled around Deidara and pulled him along to the mansion. This left Temari with Shikamaru.

Sasuke and Sakura were the first to enter the building. They selected the grandest bedroom and both began unpacking their belongings. Hidan and Pain chose a bedroom next to theirs. It had two queen sized beds perfect for the gentlemen. They did not decide to unpack immediately. Neji and Tenten had a little disagreement with bedroom selection but they finally settled for the junior master bedroom. Shino selected a bedroom downstairs as an amused Howell followed closely behind, playing with a bug. Hinata and Itachi had few selection but decided for the twin bedroom on the ground floor. Kyoya was troubled with selecting either spare bedroom downstairs or a tiny bedroom upstairs. Ino was too busy gazing dreamily at him. They chose the bedroom above. Shikamaru and Temari were left with a dark gloomy spare bedroom.

Temari: Do not, and I repeat, do not try your shadow imitation on me. I fell for it once, and I won't fall for it again.

Shikamaru: I hear you.

He mumbles for a bit and falls asleep without cleaning up.

Itachi: Hinata, you don't need to use your Byakugan at night.

Hinata: But, it's late and you're still awake. I have no idea why but I think you are trying to kill me.

Itachi: Are you freaking on your period or something? No one is going to kill anybody in this house! We're on tv right now! The only person stupid enough is my brother.

Hidan is praying to Jashin. Pain tries to muffle out his voice with his pillow but it does not work.

Pain: Hidan, how long does this go for? You've been praying for three hours now! I'm trying to sleep! You are getting blood on the sheets! Ew! People will think you're menstruating!

Hidan ignores him and continues to pray. Frustrated, Pain picks up his pillow and blanket to sleep in the bathtub.

Howl is in the bathroom preparing for his beauty sleep. He has been in there for nearly an hour and a half. He hears a knock on the door.

Shino: How much longer?

Howl: Not too long now. Just another thirty minutes tops.

Shino: I really need the bathroom now.

Howl: Then wait.

Shino desperately needed to pee. Howl continued playing with his hair products until he noticed black figures flowing under the door. The bugs surrounded him and crawled on his body. Howl was extremely furious that someone would dare interfere with his beauty session. Green slime escaped his body and drowns the bugs. Shino was to wait for much longer.


	2. Howl's Diary

Howl Pendragon

Dear diary,

Today was the first day of Beauty and the Geek. I was a beauty of course. I think this competition is a good chance for me to learn how to get along with others because I think I can be a little arrogant some times. Jiraiya the host didn't introduce me properly today, he called me with my birth name and not the name I am used to. He called me Howell Jenkins. How old fashion is that? I sound so predictable and medieval. People call me Howl these days, and I prefer to go with the last name Pendragon.

I think there will be a lot of drama in this season because I can already sense it. Hidan kept picking on me today. He thinks I'm gay or something. I think he is a male prostitute. Who honestly walks around baring his chest on TV? He isn't even at the beach! I think he has no sense of fashion and absolutely no sense of trying to carry himself as a respectable man. He cuts himself too. So not sexy. Hidan isn't the only one that treats me like dirt. My roommate is the other one.

Shino is pretty cool overall and he has pet bugs that live in his body. I miss my spiders. I hope Sophie hasn't killed them yet. Anyways it was bed time so I needed to be ready for my beauty sleep. I needed to have a thorough facial wash with toner and moisturizer. I also needed to exfoliate my skin. My hair needs blow drying and I knew I would take some time. I asked him if he needed the toilet and he said no. Halfway through flossing my teeth, he comes banging the door. How rude! I told him that I wasn't ready but he was so annoying. He kept throwing himself at the door. Then, he let his bugs in on me.

I was so mad. I hated being angry but this time, he has truly ticked me off. My head shook as I sucked in my breath. Then I drowned his stupid little pests with my green slime. Angry that I have to start cleaning myself again, I muttered a short curse on Shino and he peed the floor. I took another 3 hours to finally get myself together and I went to bed with a smile on my face.

Goodnight,

Howl


End file.
